At first blush, it sounded like a dream come true: a studio in Polk Gulch for just $1,500 a month, a chance to be free of roommates, and a prime nightlife location.
After all, the quest to find a San Francisco apartment has become super intense in recent months, thanks to the AI boom and the city's inability to build housing. The average rent is up 1.37% from last month and up 6.69% year-over-year, according to Zumper.
But any feelings of excitement from the listing I found on Craigslist’s “Apartments/Housing for Rent” section imploded once I set eyes on the property.
After texting with Lloyd, who was subletting the place and declined to share his last name, he arranged a meeting for me with a “friend” who would show me the unit. Lloyd lives in Tahoe and couldn’t show me around himself, he said.
From the outside, things were promising. The four-story, Mediterranean Revival building at 1722 Washington St. has six units with bay windows facing the street, crowned by red shingles.
Lloyd’s friend Paul ushered me through the front door and down to a dark basement hallway leading to the back of the building. I passed through a gate with a sign showing a dachshund and the words “Beware of my wiener” and stepped into the yard, which consisted of a paved patio, an overgrown hedge, a stack of plastic chairs, and weeds.
According to the listing, the apartment offers access to the yard, a bedroom, and a "bonus room." But what you really get is a reality check on the preposterous San Francisco rental market.
Let’s start with the bonus room, which is essentially a shed but could be conceived as a very low-quality ADU. It has a toilet with a bed suspended above it, as well as a sink and a table. The wooden bed platform appears to be twin-size, which shouldn’t be a problem, since you’re crazy if you think you could convince a second person to clamber up the metal ladder to join you. There’s only a foot of space between the top of the mattress and the ceiling.
If you don’t want to sleep in the shed and risk a concussion, there’s also a bedroom.
Walking up a set of stairs from the yard, the 120-square-foot main bedroom has a similar setup: The bed is hung from a chain over the toilet and comes with a ladder for access. Whether the chain could support the weight of two people is another mystery.
This room, at least, has a shower, but no sink. If you want to wash your hands after using the toilet, the nearest sink is in the shed outside.
There’s also a clear safety hazard: The only way to access the street from the apartment is through the long basement-level hallway — not ideal in case of a fire or earthquake.
Lloyd, 64, the former tenant and brother of the building’s co-owner Chester Huey, threatened to sue The Standard if we wrote about his listing. In a phone interview after the tour, he said he needs the rent money to pay for a medical procedure.
The retired BART mechanic admitted that he had not secured permits to add the toilets and shower, saying that doing so would have made the unit unaffordable. He said his listing gave low-income tenants an opportunity to get their own place.
“Yes, it is illegal, but I need money to do what I’m going to do,” he said. “I’m not hurting anyone. I’m offering something these people want. … There’s such a housing shortage.”
But when the listing was dropped into a local subreddit, people seemed more disgusted than thankful. In a thread titled "Serious question, is this legal?" more than 300 people commented on the unit’s grim appearance.
"This is straight up like a jail cell layout. WTF, lol," wrote one Redditor.
"It's missing the slot in the door where the food tray gets passed through," another chimed in.
Huey, the building's co-owner, said he was unaware that his brother was listing the apartment or had done unpermitted work on the unit and shed.
“This is a big mess,” he said.
Lloyd, who used to live in the apartment, brushed off flooding and sewage backup concerns from San Francisco’s system of sewage and stormwater drainage, which can overflow into homes during heavy rain.
“That’s everywhere in the city,” he said.
He also denied that the shed could be used as a kitchen, as my tour guide had suggested.
“The shed is for storage,” Lloyd said, adding that he used to keep his dogs inside.
“I have five dachshunds,” he said. “They make a lot of noise.”
Lloyd added that he plans to remove the toilets and shower.
If you’ve read this far and still feel the room is a good deal, I regret to report that the unit is no longer available — to anyone.
And that’s my fault, technically. I reached out to the city’s Department of Building Inspection with a screenshot of the posting and photos of the apartment, seeking to understand if the unit was compliant with housing codes. I heard back the next day.
“It appears the unit listed violates the city’s building and housing codes. We are opening an investigation and will conduct a site visit to verify the illegal conditions and potentially issue a notice of violation,” an agency spokesperson wrote in an email.
After learning that the Department of Building Inspection had been contacted about the apartment, Lloyd said he had pulled the listing, “because the city knows about it.”
“I’m going to rip it all out,” he said of the plumbing appliances, “and that’ll be the end of it.”
Just another San Francisco apartment dream, flushed down the toilet beneath the bed.