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Send Poop to Your Ex on Valentine’s Day by Donating to This SF Animal Shelter

Written by Liz LindqwisterPublished Feb. 09, 2023 • 2:01pm
Guinea pigs at SF Animal Care and Control | Courtesy SFACC

Feeling crappy about Valentine’s Day? Are you looking for a different, unique, smelly kind of V-day present? Want to donate to a good cause while getting some sweet revenge on a former lover? Perhaps you’re just a bitter ex who wants to make a statement?

San Francisco Animal Care and Control (SFACC) has your back: This Valentine’s Day, the city’s municipal animal shelter is offering “Crappy Valentine’s Day” e-cards to those who donate at least $5 to the organization. 

It’s not your average love note or romantic missive—the animal shelter’s crappygrams will include the excretory efforts of the shelter’s roughly 30 guinea pigs, who are all waiting for new homes. 

A guinea pig e-card artist is just waiting get creative. | Courtesy SFACC

The shelter says it will have its guinea pigs poop on a card bearing the name of your ex (or lover or hater or enemy), posting the turd-laden lovegram on its social media channels. It’s a team effort: The guinea pig who contributed its, erm, labor will be credited on the card. 

SFACC has an abundance of guinea pigs and other animals available for adoption, and the shelter has cut guinea pig adoption fees to $10. Proceeds from crappygram donations go to the Friends of SFACC fund, which benefits the shelter’s operations.

Send a poop-laden message to your enemies here

Crappy Valentine’s Day!

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