Possibly the most surprising entry on The Standard’s SF100 is Aella, who sits among better-known talents like George Kittle and Zac Posen in our Performers category. An independent sex researcher, X provocateur, and wildly popular Substacker, Aella is suddenly everywhere: on Lex Fridman’s podcast, featured in The Atlantic (opens in new tab), and now, appearing in our guide of the most powerful and influential people in San Francisco. Since no short write-up could contain all of Aella’s multitudes, here’s a longer look at the Bay Area’s new sex superstar.
Aella — the homeschooled fundamentalist Calvinist turned Substack sex researcher, OnlyFans model, and $4,000-an-hour escort (opens in new tab) — is the go-to sexpert for a certain Gen Zer or millennial straight guy fed up with the Bay Area dating scene. Her advice: “Guys who struggle with dating should start making spreadsheets … and figuring out what converts.”
Data makes everything better, including sex, Aella notes. Her polyamorous boyfriend “gives girls an exit survey after he has sex with them,” she adds. “That’s how you get better at sex. You collect feedback.”
Aella speaks from experience: After a deep dive into the factors that increase success on OnlyFans (opens in new tab), she A/B tested her content, which skyrocketed her to the top 1% (opens in new tab) of earners on the platform. During her best month, she pulled in $103,000, she claims. What’s true for sex is true for business: “Figure out what’s working, what’s not, and iterate.”
Aella’s combination of nerdiness and sexual openness, and her look — something between cottagecore and dark faerie — have catapulted her from camgirl to cult figure. She’s also become an intellectual pinup for certain denizens of the “heterodox” internet.
Her provocative Twitter polls (opens in new tab) and Guided Track surveys — more than 800,000 people (opens in new tab) filled in her “Big Kink” questionnaire — helped expand her reach to 231,000 followers on X (opens in new tab) and 118,000 subscribers to Knowingless (opens in new tab), her Substack. Marc Andreessen has called her ideas “fantastic (opens in new tab).”
“In the Bay Area, she’s very influential,” says Jennifer Kesteloot (opens in new tab), a San Francisco artist who met Aella in 2020 on Clubhouse, an audio social media app. “She’s inspirational.”
Aella’s posts (opens in new tab) on polyamory inspired Kesteloot to open up her 25-year marriage. “Her writing was very convincing,” says Kesteloot, who reports that her new poly life is “phenomenal.”
Aella’s candor has made her a sought-after speaker — she has discussed AI and OnlyFans on “Lex Fridman Podcast” (opens in new tab); gangbangs on “No Jumper (opens in new tab),” a hip-hop culture podcast; and America’s so-called sex recession on Bari Weiss’ “Honestly (opens in new tab).” She even presented on data-driven orgies (opens in new tab) at Hereticon, a conference hosted by Michael Solana, CMO of Peter Thiel’s Founders Fund.
In some ways, Aella’s frankness is just the latest iteration of the Bay Area’s long history of pushing sexual boundaries and shifting what is considered acceptable among consenting adults. But what makes her a thoroughly modern icon is her very San Francisco embrace of data. Where previous generations of libertines led with their hearts (as well as other organs), Aella uses her mind as her guide.
“Nerdy men think about sex in a systematic way, but it’s rare to find a woman who thinks [like that] and is willing to talk about it,” she says. “I don’t have much competition.”
Her Substack has been pivotal in her rise. In October 2023, she launched her seven-part “Good at Sex (opens in new tab)” series, covering everything from “werewolfing (opens in new tab)” (“talk to women with the same energy you would have sex with them”) to optimal foreplay duration (15 to 30 minutes) to a breakdown of sexual subtypes (e.g., “hurt me” girls vs. “please me” girls).
To say the series was a hit would be an understatement. From October 2023 to March 2024, her earnings increased 1,691.5%, according to Clyde Rathbone, who runs partnerships at Substack. Around 4% of her 118,000 subscribers are paying, he shared, which equates to about $400,000 a year, by The Standard’s estimate.
“Aella uses her position to collect massive amounts of data … to answer questions about human relationships and sexuality,” says Ben Pace, cofounder of LessWrong 2.0, (opens in new tab) a rationalist forum. “Her cultural power involves exploring taboo subjects with innocence.”
Some have criticized Aella for her lack of credentials, but she casually shrugs that off. “It’s a double standard I’m held to because I’m a sex worker,” she says. Sure, she sometimes uses the wrong research term, but that doesn’t give people the right to “assume I don’t know what I’m talking about,” she adds. “I understand very deeply how this thing works.” She’s upfront about methodology flaws and regularly links to her raw (opens in new tab) data. (opens in new tab)
Whether she’s a thought leader of the new sexual paradigm or just another canny content maker pushing boundaries for clicks, one thing is clear: In a region obsessed with quantifying the unquantifiable, Aella’s belief that sex — and, who knows, maybe even love? — can be optimized is finding plenty of takers.